What I am
by decembergirl1942
Summary: Seventeen year old Bella Swan should have died after falling off a building. Instead she wakes up in Edward Cullens bedroom as a vampire. He knows she is special but doesn't understand the connection between them. When The Volturi begin investigating the Cullens they discover Bella isn't who they think she is. Can they keep her safe or will she be the destruction of them all?
1. Chapter 1

**Hey everyone! Here is my second Twilight fic... I've been working on this for a while and am excited to see what people think! Check out my other story Cant Deny You... and please review!**

Chapter One

Her memory was hazy, like looking through thick fog. Bella could barely remember the party, pulsing music and mind numbing alcohol. The pain of her mother's death being carried away by the sharp liquor. Officially the worst summer ever.

The events leading to the fifteen story drop were nowhere to be found in her mind. She had absolutely no memory of the fall. One minute she was getting another drink and the next she was waking up on the ground covered in glass and blood.

Bella had felt the glass scrape against her arms, legs, and stomach with every shallow breath. The sharp stings sobering her just long enough to feel the terror before her mind shut down again; refusing to believe she was dying. Her body going numb along with her mind.

She could hear the screaming and shouting, making her head throb, but it seemed far away like static on a radio in the other room. She noticed the blood under her abdomen and neck; thick sticky pools congealing around her shredded skin.

It coated her hands and face making it hard to breathe. Bella knew she was dying. The sounds grew farther and farther away. Her mind slipped into blissful darkness.

She wondered if this was how her mother felt; dying slowly of pancreatic cancer. Regretting past decisions and mistakes. Like not telling her until she was so sick she couldn't move. Her last memory of her will be in that hospital bed; thin and pale with bug eyes and a raspy voice.

Time flew by yet crawled slowly all around her. Her mind replaying the mistakes made in her short seventeen years of life. She should have cried at the funeral. She should have screamed at her that it wasn't fair to spring this on her.

Soft footsteps sounded close to her head. Bella focused hard on the sound, trying to keep herself focused. Alive.

The pain came back this time worse. Her bones felt like they were rubbing against each other; her muscles tightened in fear making the pain even more horrible.

Large cool hands grabbed and pulled at her mangled body. Broken bones, skull fractures, lacerations. Her mothers' medical knowledge helped her understand exactly what injuries she had sustained.

All the pain she felt reduced to a few sentences. Ironic, she thought, that emotions and experiences could never be expressed with enough words. For some reason her mind focused on this argument and Bella knew it was stupid but she couldn't stop the soft tears from falling down her cheeks. Maybe she was being taken to Heaven. Maybe she would share her afterlife with her mother as she had her life.

She found herself easily distracted by her rasping lungs and screaming pulse. Death was long and painful. A stab at her collar bone and then wrist brought her back to consciousness of her surroundings.

The cold hands lifted her high into the air, against a firm body. Whoever was holding her hissed as something cracked but she couldn't feel it, at least not in comparison to all the burning pain flowing through her body.

After a while of being carried the whole world went black and all she could focus on was the burning flames crawling through her body. Bella couldn't hear anything but her own breathing. No more shouting or sirens. No more hands pulling and twisting her body back into shape.

Just Bella in the silent paradise of her mind that was being burnt alive. Yet this was nothing compared to the pain of losing her mother. The memory of her death played over and over in Bella's mind.

Her usual control had slipped when her mother died. Her mind spiraling into a darkness too deep for anyone to pull her out of.

Bella wasn't sure how long she had been in this odd form of limbo. No sound, no feeling, just the memory. She wanted to be anywhere but here.

Unfortunately for Bella the world came rushing back unceremoniously all at one time. Sound, pain, fear all rushing through her veins and invading her mind. Smells from all over the room overwhelmed her. Oddly she knew how to place each scent. Her mind cataloguing where each new one came from.

The crisp linen scent coming from the sheets and pillows around her. Warm, spice coming from the wood floors.

"You're safe now."

The voice was a new distraction. Sending chills all over her body and creating a different type of fire in her veins. Smooth as velvet, his voice sounded like music to her ears.

Oh no she really did die and she really is in Heaven, or maybe Hell with how dark it is.

The soft voice whispered beautifully poetic lines in her ear while a large warm hand ran through her curly dark hair.

Bella didn't recognize the voice. The strong scent of honey and orange blossoms overwhelmed her senses for quite a few minutes. Her breathing calmed down as she focused on the breathing next to her. The words grew quieter over time until suddenly he stopped.

"You can open your eyes whenever you're ready."

"Am I dead?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Oh my sweet goodness! Thanks a lot for all the reviews and follows! Here is the next update hope you guys enjoy it... New chapters will be posted every other FRIDAY so be on the look out. Review and let me know what you're thinking, I'm really curious!**

CHAPTER TWO

Bella had to repeat her question. Her voice didn't sound right. The deep chuckle close to her ear made her flinch. Bella braced for the pain, yet she didn't feel anything. No pain, no discomfort. Something in her mind wriggled free, something was different about herself. She just couldn't place it.

"You are very much alive, Bella, just open your eyes."

The soft voice grew stronger as if sensing she needed the push to join the land of the living.

Except she shouldn't be alive. The accident had to have killed her. Bella couldn't imagine anyone surviving a fifteen story drop out a window. Yet, here she was. Conscious and breathing. Her thoughts were frantic.

She mumbled incoherently as warm hands lifted her body up against a wooden headboard. She refused to open her eyes yet. The sounds and scents were overwhelming enough.

"Whatever you say princess."

Was she talking out loud?

Bella opened her eyes wide making her blink like a mad woman as the light forced its way into her cornea. Her head felt heavy and her tongue twisted.

She did know this man. She had met him at the coffee shop in her father's small hometown. He had walked right up to her and mentioned something about her looking like a princess. It had sent fire blazing through her veins coloring her face in tomato red.

Bella was so distracted by the man and his beautifully sculpted face she almost didn't notice they were not in a hospital. The light shining on them came from large windows on the south wall and a light fixture overhead. The walls colored a soft blue-green.

"Where are we?"

Again her mind rejected the sound of her voice as being natural.

He watched her carefully, his perfectly round golden eyes and pink bow shaped lips giving nothing away.

"My home."

Bella seemed to finally catch up that she had been kidnapped by a lunatic and drugged so badly she could feel no pain. This man seemed to think nothing of the fact that she had no idea where she was or who she was with. Not to mention the fact that she almost died!

"Before you start assuming something crazy I want you to know, my name is Edward Cullen. You're perfectly safe now."

The fire in her veins sped faster as he spoke. Her sharp tongue ready to attack.

"What the hell are you thinking? I barely even know you and I just fell from the top floor of a hotel building. Oh yeah and I'm not dead."

Bella stopped to think and let her muddled brain catch up with her tangent.

"How am I not dead?"

Edward smirked at Bella like he had just told a dirty joke and she wasn't getting it.

"That's hard to explain."

This stopped her completely. She stared down at her hands. Something about them didn't seem right. Her skin shimmered iridescently in the sunlight. The power beneath her flimsy skin seemed infinite.

There were no scratches. Her body didn't hurt anymore, she felt perfect. Better than perfect.

Edward didn't stop her as she slid off the bed to stand in front of him and walk to the large mirror by the dresser. Which should have been impossible.

A thin white sundress covered her bare alabaster skin. Her hips seemed a bit wider and had more curve to them. Her long dark hair curled down to her waist, clean and shiny. Not a scratch was on her body, no bones poked out from her skin as she had seen the night before.

She knew she was different, she could feel it in every nerve ending.

Bella touched her face. The changes were subtle. Her round face seemed sharper, fiercer. Once pale thin lips were now fuller and stained red. Her eyes held the most change. The eyes staring back were not hers. Black covered her iris instead of the chocolate brown she had inherited from her father.

"What happened to me?"

The voice filling the air was not her own. She could finally hear and note the difference in the way she spoke. The soft whisper seemed to whip through the air. Harsh to her ears. The sound was alluring and frightening all at the same time.

"Bella, your injuries were extensive, you were dying."

She knew this already. The pain she had suffered was unlike anything. But now it was just a memory.

A very distant memory.

"Are you going to tell me what you did or not?"

Edward sighed before coming to stand next to her. His beautiful golden eyes watching hers in the mirror.

"I turned you into a vampire."

He let his words fill the space of the room, chilling the air around them. Bella would have yelled at him or thought he was crazy. But looking at herself in the mirror now; she couldn't deny the truth.

She opened her mouth, her tongue poking at her two sharp canine teeth. They were subtly longer and sharper than normal. But other than that she looked human.

"Why?"

He seemed shocked at her question. He was expecting denial.

"Why would you save me? Why would you turn me into a monster?"

His tall frame shrouded her much smaller one in shadow. The power radiating off of him was hard to ignore. Bella refused to be afraid.

"I turned you because you remind me of someone I used to know, and the very thought of the world going on without you seemed impossible to me."

Bella would have said something smart; she almost did. But the way his eyes locked on hers during his confession and the earnest tone in his voice made her realize that this was really happening. This wasn't a dream or some weird drug hallucination. To be sure she pinched herself roughly on the arm. It didn't hurt exactly, just an annoying tug.

Bella really stood before this man, a vampire, in nothing but a shirt after he had just changed her to save her from dying. Her mind spun rapidly around her thoughts, she had always been one to focus on the details.

"I think I need to sit down."

Now that she thought about it; she couldn't feel her heart beating in her chest, she couldn't feel the warmth of the sun kiss her skin.

Her reaction to the sun surprised her. There was no pain or flames like she had read in books. It just made her sparkle. Which becam oddly fascinating and beautiful the longer she stared.

Edward followed her back to the bed and sat next to her. His thigh touching hers. She could only focus on that for a few moments. Had he meant to touch her, was it an accident? Finally her mind came back to her life.

"Everything's changed now hasn't it? I can never go back to the life I had."

He didn't say anything for a long time. They sat there in silence until finally he mumbled.

"I'm sorry."

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